Shoot 'Em Up

Posted : 6 months, 3 weeks ago on 3 February 2008 11:23 (A review of Shoot 'Em Up)

Shoot 'em up alright. I really believe that this movie was just an excuse for a bunch of men to play with guns, get into ridiculous gun fights and do very unbelievable stunts.
If it wasn't for Clive Owens I wouldn't have bothered watching the whole thing but there is something sexy about that man eating carrots. Oh and the thing with the carrots! It was stupid like a lot of other things in this movie. For instance, the wise cracks were not witty, the plot was pathetic (also pointless and reaffirming for me that this movie was just made for the guns), he said "this is weird" way too much, it surprises me that the baby never got hurt and then there is the sex scene. It's the type of sex scene I have never seen and the type that makes you say WTF?
If you can sit through the first 5-10 minutes where he kills a man with a carrot (yes you read right) and then delivers a baby while in a gunfight and not say to yourself "Yeah right" then there is a chance you might enjoy this movie otherwise you'll probably be left wondering what gun happy idiot created this bullcrap?

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Spider-Man 3 review

Posted : 7 months ago on 29 January 2008 12:00 (A review of Spider-Man 3)

Try as hard as I might I couldn't get into this movie. It was pretty average. Sure the way Sandman and Venom was done was cool but that's about the only thing that stood out for me. I didn't like either Toby Maguire's or Kirsten Dunst's performance and I definitely didn't buy Kirsten Dunst singing. I should have realised that I wasn't going to enjoy this right from the beginning. The opening credits part made me feel ill and went on far too long. The action scenes had far too much action (if that's possible) that was all over the place so much so it gave me a headache and I had trouble seeing what was going on. If there is a number 4 I won't care to see it, after seeing this movie I am done with this franchise.

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The Bourne Ultimatum review

Posted : 7 months ago on 28 January 2008 11:55 (A review of The Bourne Ultimatum)

I don't have anything really bad to say about this movie, not really, it was action packed right from the word go and I think Matt Damon was made for this role, there was only one problem. The camera work. In this day and age you'd think people would understand the benefits of holding a camera steady! It was ridiculous. They can't seriously think it's making it more realistic. More like it's causing severe bouts of motion sickness. I found it very hard to concentrate on what was going on at times and other times I had to concentrate extra hard just so I could keep track especially in fight scenes. People really need to learn how to use a camera. Other then that it was a good movie which I really enjoyed.

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Tideland review

Posted : 7 months ago on 27 January 2008 05:31 (A review of Tideland)

In the first 5 minutes or so you get to find out why this kid is playing with dolls heads. It's understandable, if I had parents like that I'd play with dolls heads too.
This movie is pretty out there and yet it's also heartbreaking as you can see just how lonely this kid is. Basically not one of those movies that you remember for being bad or good, but for how different it is I think or possibly intense and heartbreaking. You'll have to watch it yourself to decide whether it was good or bad.

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Not Another Teen Movie review

Posted : 7 months ago on 27 January 2008 05:29 (A review of Not Another Teen Movie)

Oh look, it's a spoof and what easier genre to pay out then teen movies? If this hadn't of been on tv I never would have watched this movie but it was and I did. It got some chuckles out of me but that was about it. No laughing until it hurt. No memorable comedic moments for me to mention at some point in time in the future. Not another teen movie really is just another teen movie.

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Soul Survivors

Posted : 7 months ago on 26 January 2008 04:28 (A review of Soul Survivors)

For a mediocre predictable movie full of substandard acting and with a lame ending I actually enjoyed this. Whether it was because how the main character ran (Melissa Sagemiller) was amusing or because it was good for late night trash I don't know, I just enjoyed it.

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Metropolis

Posted : 7 months, 1 week ago on 23 January 2008 06:33 (A review of Metropolis)

If you're into film not just for the entertainment value but for the art of it then you might like watching this. Although if you want to watch it and sit through the whole thing might be best to watch it if you're in the mood for it and like black and white silent films. I must admit, even though I don't mind this type of film I was yawning a fair bit by the end of it but I was pretty tired so I blame it on that. I'm glad I've watched it and I did enjoy it to an extent especially the part with Hel the Machine Man and some of the imagery.

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An American Tail

Posted : 7 months, 1 week ago on 23 January 2008 06:19 (A review of An American Tail)

I loved this movie when I was a kid and still like it now. For starters it's cute. It's also short and sweet with lots of moral lessons in it which is perfect for young audiences with short attention spans.
The only real hang up I have is that the Russian mice don't always sound Russian, well that's the adults anyway and the young mice don't sound Russian at all, but I'm sure kids aren't going to notice that.

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Atomik Circus

Posted : 7 months, 1 week ago on 21 January 2008 06:15 (A review of The Return of James Battle)

This movie was silly. Not the stupid type of silly but just plain ole silly. I missed the beginning of it but it was pretty easy to follow without seeing where it started. I also had no idea what the movie was about so when I started watching it it seemed like a comedic drama and then a comedic drama/horror with the introduction of these flying aliens that had tentacle like appendages and would attack and decapitate people. That was done really well I think. With all the fake blood and gore that is.
Then there was the dog which was silly and possibly a little amusing because it wasn't real.
Even though it was silly it wasn't bad to watch although I didn't like the ending. The ending was just stupid.

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I Am Bob review

Posted : 7 months, 1 week ago on 20 January 2008 12:12 (A review of I Am Bob)

As good as this may have been, and it was good sort of, I just could not get past the fact that no one could seem to recognise the real Bob Geldof compared to impersonaters. Especially when said impersonaters look nothing like him. It rubbed me the wrong way amongst other things and that's something I don't like in a film but at least that's a way to get you to remember it!

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